I’m what you might disdainfully refer to as a ‘traveller’, and since I’ve become stranded in truly the worst place on planet earth – New Zealand’s South Island – by a virus sweeping the globe faster than you can say “Don’t lick that door handle,” I clearly have nothing better to do than erroneously proclaim myself an expert on this brand new (ish) COVID-19 thing. Due to my newfound internet-based wealth of coronavirus knowledge, plus 819 days and counting on the road, I am clearly well positioned to advise other travellers on what to do during a pandemic, as well as people who aren’t travelling, or in fact anyone bored enough to read this article. So sit back, grab your hand sanitiser and allow me to guide you through what was once the stuff of Hollywood movies but is now your foreseeable future.(more…)
Ahh, 2010. The year David Cameron was elected Prime Minister, 33 Chileans were rescued from a mine, and Inception was released. Who’d have thought ten years after Christopher Nolan’s huge blockbuster infiltrated our cinemas people would still have no idea what it’s about.
2010 was the year I moved, bright eyed and full of ambition, to the big city from my rural hatching place. Ambition that was soon crushed, alas, by economic turmoil, the world seemingly in free fall from the 2008 Global Financial Crisis, as well as the crippling self-doubt of young adulthood, which was a joyful time. Still, the 2010s were considerably better than the 2000s, with those ugly and impractical low waisted ‘hipster’ jeans, the so-called War on Terror, and, worse, Britney Spears all over the radio. What a strange decade it was.
Nonetheless, as we edge tentatively into 2020, allow me to strain my memory, dimly recall what I’ve been doing all this time, and thus present to you something you had no idea you needed in your life: Bella’s completely objective review of the last ten years. Grab a beverage and your comedy ‘2020’ party sunglasses, and prepare yourself for a slightly depressing but ultimately redeeming trip down memory lane as I rate the 2010s a mediocre, though not terrible, 3 out of 5 stars.
Ah, yes, the great philosophical principles of life. Confucianism, Just War theory, Altruism, Human Rights, Feminism… and YOLO. People laugh when I rationalise my undertakings with a casual shrug and a simple, “YOLO”. They laugh because it’s amusing, and perhaps a bit unexpected, to use dubious internet terminology to guide important decisions in life like entering a half marathon, dying my hair radical new colours, and making plans for my future. Things weren’t always this way, though. What started out as someone’s semi-serious joke at my expense, challenging me to exit my mundane, cautious existence has become a doctrine so integrated into my life that I can’t imagine going back to whatever it was that I was doing before I ate YOLO for breakfast.(more…)
I was thinking, there’s quite a lot of stuff here on Bella’s Odyssey. I pictured myself visiting my blog for the first time and it invoked the mild panic-inducing lost and bewildered feeling I get when I’m in a department store, trapped by the fluorescent lights and endless clutter of brightly coloured things, which is not how I want people to feel when they come here. So, I gathered together the best bits of stuff on this digital vault of my thoughts about life for your casual perusal, saving you the hassle of mindlessly traipsing around the archives like someone unsure of their whereabouts in a multi-storey car park.
If I were to stick my recent work in a centrifuge, it would probably separate into ‘travel’ and ‘life,’ so that’s how I’ve divided my posts…
Australia. The land of eternal sunshine, overly descriptive road signs and a preposterous number of ant species. The place where it’s acceptable for men to wear short shorts, you’ll get cream with your dessert whether you like it or not, and where it’s illegal to complain about the rain. Don’t be fooled into thinking that travelling is all jet setting, partying, glamour and lounging around on the beach drinking beers. It isn’t. Being a solo traveller (did I just call myself a solo traveller?) you are faced with a whole new world of challenges that are hard to understand unless you’ve done it yourself. But I’ll give it a go.(more…)
Have you ever wondered why the British drink tea so much? Perhaps you think that we’re obsessed with this strange beverage with its oriental origins and milky additives. Well, we are. You see, tea is more than a drink to us. It’s a way of life. Let me explain.(more…)
I’ve recently discovered ‘flexing’. What is that, you ask? I’m not convinced that anyone really knows for sure but I think it’s very amusing. Flexing, or maybe I should call it ‘flexin’, isn’t the thing that happens when you tense your muscles – well, it is the thing that happens when you tense your muscles, but that’s not the kind of flexin’ that I’m talking about. What I’m talking about translates to ‘showing off’; flaunting your material wealth and using this as a barometer to demonstrate to others how worthy you are as a person. It’s not a new concept and the term ‘flexin’ has been around for ages, but I should state that the cutting edge of culture (especially American culture) doesn’t reach me at the rock under which I live until way after the event, so if you already know what I’m talking about you’re probably thinking “Pfff, gurl where you been?”(more…)
When I was little, I was excited about the prospect of adult life. I envisaged a whole world of adventure and possibility, no bed time and no one around to tell you what to do. Adults seem like they have their shit together. Things make sense to them and they know about stuff and, as a kid, I wanted some of that for myself. Being a kid is tough. No one takes you seriously, you have to do what people tell you and and you’re really small so there are many things you need help with, like opening impossible crisp packets and the vexing task of tying your shoelaces. Plus you have to go to school, which, for me, anyway, was a confusing, terrible place that felt like a twelve-year prison sentence. So I longed for the day I could burn my school uniform and do what I wanted in the world of grown-ups.(more…)